Now, before I get to the next part of this story… I spent approx. one month piling, sorting and carting buckets and boxes of tools and well, junk from storage buildings to the house. Where I would sit in my chair with the sorting bucket in front of me with the ENTIRE center of our living room floor COVERED in storage bins…
One for screw drivers, another for hammers, another for wrenches, etc., etc. I swear, if I had to sort another box or bin I was going to SCREAM!
And of course, me not knowing every tool made and/or what some were even for, I’d have a “mystery bin”, as well. Which thankfully, my brother would also occasionally come out to tell me if things were trash, treasure or “who knows” as he would also say from time to time.
Yep, you know it’s bad when another man can’t even tell you what something is lol
And let me tell you, when I was done sorting my very last bin of tools, I shouted it to anyone who would listen.
I DID however, figure out why (especially men) have so many of the SAME tools… When they can’t find the one they’re looking for (because they are so disorganized), they simply go out and buy a NEW one! I could almost open up my own tool store by the time I was done, I kid you not.
I will give it to my Husband though, rest his sole, he left my son and I with a lot of laughter.
Our son had all his tool boxes from work (he was a machinist) and I had well… everything else. And we would text each other, sometimes multiple times a day, saying… “well, I’m up to 12 of such and such, how many YOU got?”. And he’d say… “well, I only have two so far, but, I have 50 of (whatever he had)”.
Yes, I kid you not, he actually had 50 of the SAME ITEM! Sorry, don’t recall now what exactly it was.
We both, rather quickly I might add, came to the conclusion my Husband was a border line hoarder. He couldn’t throw anything away even when it was broken and no hope of fixing/using it… Broken handles with no “tool” attached, empty spray cans, old partially used motor oil and other fluids, pieces of metal (all kinds, remember he was a machinist by trade), riding lawn mower with no back axle, pieces of lawn mowers, old weed eaters, boat parts and much, much more (never did find the back end to the lawnmower lol).
Plus, he collected OTHER types of “stuff”, too. Whether it was useful apparently wasn’t an issue. Why? “Because you just never know!” Am I right all you MEN out there? Well, I can honestly say (as a woman)… “YES, you do know!” :o)
In a nut-shell – You name it… we found it. Hence the 20 foot growing trash heap building up along side our driveway.
I will say, I did have a few moments during all the sorting and carting crap around that I would suddenly feel very much alone and extremely out of my depth.
Our son could only come occasionally and his idea of getting rid of the “mess” was to simply bull doze it all down and have it ALL hauled away.
Him and I come from VERY different worlds. He wants fast and doesn’t care so much about the cost (even though he doesn’t have the money). Nor does he have the same value of a dollar.
Remember, I’m not currently working and my home business is currently in transition. So, I can’t afford to simply bull doze the place or toss everything instead of take the time to sort the trash from the good stuff.
At the very least I can get SOMETHING for the things I don’t want/need in a yard sale. I have to have one anyway, so, why simply toss things others may want/need and make even just a little money back from all I’m having to spend to clean up the place and make the much needed home repairs.
Then I also have the mixed fun of having my son on one side saying… “just toss it” and my brother on the other side saying… “keep all that, you can make money”.
The problem with BOTH suggestions… It seems everyone has an opinion about how to do things, but, NO GAME PLAN on exactly how to do it!
So, I got pretty good at just letting them prattle on, shaking my head in agreement, then do what ever the hell I THOUGHT BEST :o)
And of course, by this time, both our daughters were back to their own lives, now that all the commotion was over (or however they saw it), and their help long disappeared (sad part is, we ALL live in/near Austin, tx).
So, there I was…
Trying to stay busy so I didn’t think too much about the man and life I didn’t have anymore and feeling VERY much alone more times than I’d like.
Now, none of our children have ever really been there when it counted. Except for a short period (maybe year, year and half) when one of our daughters did come whenever we needed extra help doing something that was too much for me and my Husband to handle.
But, for the most part… we always knew we couldn’t really count on anyone else’s help to get anything done. It was just me and him. And we learned to get used to that idea. But, it didn’t mean it still didn’t hurt a great deal at times. Especially, when you hear others talking about their children.
And of course, when things went south for their dad, they did put in effort to be there for him, so, I’ll give them that.
The only one who HAS stuck by my side helping whenever/where ever he can is our son.
But, I’m not kidding myself, I know as soon as things settle down, all the work is done and I go back to work, we’ll go right back to only seeing him on Holidays, if that. But, it’s ok.
Because through out all this and in the process of getting rid of things and cleaning up, I’ve met some pretty cool people, met even more of my neighbors and made some new friends who seem to be more than happy to help whenever I need it. So, all in all, things are not so bad.
So, onwards and upwards and my Dad always said!
Next up, clearing and demolition… This you will have to SEE to believe.